The Eyes of Silver Breeze

A friend once gave me a pack of Home Alone II trading cards as a gag gift. My question, of course, was “Who the hell thought it would be a good idea to make Home Alone II trading cards?” But maybe they came from an alternate universe where all new movies are accompanied by a trading-card set. (The nexus of our universe and theirs was, apparently, Big Lots.) Rather than ramble on about how funny these Improbable Movie Trading Cards are, I’ll let you click over to the Automatic Lifestyle Dispenser blog and see for yourself. Bravo!

(continue reading…)

          

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

(continue reading…)

          

Ever since he moved on from his beloved Boing Boing, internet fauxlebrity Joel Johnson has been a man without a home, floating aimlessly from cyber-bench to digital flophouse in an attempt to find a place he belongs. Today he’s on our couch. No, we’re not kidding. Please enjoy this very special guest blog as we attempt to make ourselves look like real bloggers by hobnobbing with the A-list.

(continue reading…)

          

(continue reading…)

          

(continue reading…)

          

After almost four years of our daily podcast, we sure have a lot of episodes in the can. (It’s where we do our best thinking.) Have you noticed how certain themes recur? We have! For example, grab hold of the common thread running through these four thrilling files of yesteryear, which are all about International Talk Like A Pirate Day.

(continue reading…)

          

This isn’t the most appetizing way to break a relative blog-posting lull, but this incredible medical secret must be known! From the Found Footage Festival comes this clip of a nut named Arthur Bloom explaining how he stays so, um, young: “I’m actually extracting death from the mouth…That is mucus coming out of my mouth right now…The first time in the history of the world that a new substance has been found in the mouth. This could probably stop babies from having birth defects…Watch it sizzle, watch it sag, watch it bubble…Please believe me, the world’s being killed by this stuff.”

(continue reading…)

          

The public clamors for it. The big studios will pay anything for it. The awards are already engraved. But there’s one thing keeping the Woot biopic off of your silver screens: choosing a director with the vision and genius worthy of our story. Since we’re having trouble getting Woody Allen, Ingmar Bergman, and John Ford to return our calls – especially the dead ones – we need your help:

(continue reading…)

          

(continue reading…)

          

Internet traffic stats are about as reliable as a Kleenex bikini. So take this with a bag o’ salt. But in trying to guess where the economy is headed, John Biggs of Crunchgear suggests that we look at “Woot traffic as an indicator of financial stability”. That’s the title of a blog post where he suggests that a perceived uptick in Woot’s Alexa stats and whatnot means the economy is on the rebound. We’re not sure we can handle – or deserve – the mantle of Financial Tea-Leaf To The World. But whenever anybody wants to assign our little electronic yard sale an exaggerated significance, our policy is not to argue. Has the macroeconomic sitch affected your very microeconomic wooting habit?

(continue reading…)